Taking care of your parents as they age isn’t a task for the faint of heart. It can be emotionally, mentally, and even financially draining, especially when you ignore important planning discussions. It can be easy to lose sight of the end goal — enjoying whatever time you have left together in the best way possible.
But beginning the planning process now and having hard conversations early on can make a big impact. Everyone ages differently, so your approach to caring for your parents needs to be tailored to them. Keep these suggestions in mind as you move through the aging process with your folks.
1. Make Sure They’re in a Safe Environment
The most critical aspect of caring for your elderly parents is ensuring that they are physically safe and that their basic needs are being met. There are a few warning signs to be on the lookout for when evaluating their required level of care. They might need additional help if their hygiene has declined, their house is in disarray, or their fridge is filled with expired food.
Bringing in additional help to the home can also be an option — especially if they don’t want to move. Just be aware that this care can sometimes be more costly than an assisted living facility or nursing home.
If moving to a facility becomes necessary, be aware that nursing homes or assisted living communities offer different levels of services to their residents. These packages can be tailored to your folks’ specific needs to give you the peace of mind that they’re being cared for safely. If they’re already in a facility and you’re worried about possible elder abuse, don’t hesitate to contact a nursing home abuse lawyer.
2. Don’t Be Afraid to Talk About Money
Talking about money and the financial resources available to your parents can be hard. But this is one of the most important conversations to have with your folks. In fact, the earlier you can start discussing their financial plans, the easier it will be for everyone. The financial resources at their disposal will determine the level of care available to them.
If your parents are still working and generating income, this can be a great time to have this talk. They might still be able to make some changes to their financial plan when they have discretionary income at their disposal. But being transparent about their finances is vital even if they’re already retired and living on a fixed income. Set up a meeting with your parents and your siblings, if any, to talk about their current financial plan. It’s important that immediate family members be included in the discussion and have access to the same information.
You might consider bringing in an outside expert that your parents already trust, like their financial planner or lawyer. This can help offset any qualms about their children caring for them or making financial decisions. Ask your folks to gather their financial documents so you have a clear picture of their income and expenses. This can also be a good time to make sure that they have an updated will and a designated power of attorney. Having these conversations before their decision-making is impaired will make the aging process easier for everyone.
3. Encourage Healthy Habits
Meal planning, grocery shopping, and cooking might be challenging for your parents to continue as they age. But eating nutritional meals can help them maintain their physical and mental health. You might consider getting their groceries delivered to them if they’re still living on their own. Some grocery stores offer their own delivery services, but if not, companies like Instacart will deliver to their doorstep.
If meal prepping is a challenge, consider giving them a subscription to a meal kit service. Companies like Hello Fresh and Blue Apron will ship fresh ingredients complete with easy-to-follow cooking instructions. This can be a great option if your parents can’t get to the grocery store regularly but still like to cook.
It’s also important to make sure that your parents are maintaining some level of physical activity as they get older. Even the most active folks will notice a decline in their body’s physical capabilities with age. Consistent exercise can help to make sure they don’t lose all of their strength and mobility. Their exercise routine doesn’t need to be strenuous or record-setting. Encourage them to join a walking group or attend a gentle yoga class.
4. Prioritize Their Social Life
Maintaining access to social settings and mentally stimulating activities is incredibly beneficial for your aging parents. But their access to social opportunities might not be a given depending on their living situation. If they live by themselves or aren’t able to drive anymore, their social stimulation is going to be more limited. This means that you need to assist them in planning ways to get out of the house regularly and safely.
Having social interactions will help them combat loneliness and isolation, which can be common among elderly folks. Regular social interaction is also crucial for individuals who might be prone to experience depression or anxiety.
It’s likewise important that they still be exposed to new situations, activities, and ideas. Mental stimulation will help them to maintain their cognitive health. Activities that challenge the brain, like reading, playing games, doing puzzles, or learning new skills, have been shown to reduce the likelihood of dementia. Plus, regular mental stimulation will improve their overall well-being. Maintaining their interests or acquiring new skills will foster a sense of autonomy and accomplishment.
Caring for aging parents isn’t the easiest undertaking. But postponing the tough conversations will only make things more challenging if they have a serious decline in health. Set yourself — and them — up for success by planning early so you can enjoy the time you have left together.